My niece is getting married this week. First of all it is hard to believe that she is even old enough to be doing that. I guess I still think of her as a little girl. I know that she is an adult and a woman now and that she is ready for this next stage in her life.
I have been watching how her mom deals with all this and I want to say right now that I hope and pray that I am like her when my boys get to this stage of life. Last night at the table several people jokingly told me that I was going to be mother of the groom--zilla. I laughed with them but in my heart I wondered if that is really how I come across. I was disappointed to think that they would see me like this. I made a vow right then and there that I was going to watch how my sister-in-law handled this and then I was going to try to be more like her.
Unfortunately, I am about as far from being like her as you could imagine. She is calm, quiet, demure, sweet, charming, laid back, relaxed, lady-like, and well, classy. I am chaotic, loud, klutzy, clowns around, control freak, as far from relaxed as you can be, tomboyish, and well, not classy. I really try hard to have the qualities that she has but for some reason when it is all said and done, I am who I am.
When I try super hard to be the quiet, reserved, calm person, people ask me why I am upset or if something is wrong or if I am mad at them. Even Jeff and the boys do that to me. It is perfectly okay for them to not say two words to me in a whole day but if I do that then I get the third degree about there must be something wrong with me.
I have always said that when my boys get married, their wives are going to be spoiled rotten because I never had any girls of my own to do that with. Ask my nieces and some of my friends. I try to spoil their girls every chance I get. That is why I am saddened by the thought that people even jokingly think I am going to be a kind of monster when my kids get married.
I have a long road ahead of me to change their perceptions of me and this wedding is going to be a good test of that. I want what is best for everyone and if that means change then so be it.
I didn't think anybody was calling you a zilla! I'm so sorry that it came across that way.
ReplyDeleteOh I am jealous of the girl that marries one of your boys. You are going to spoil them rotten. My girls think I need to learn to french braid because they loved how you to their hair. I will tell you one thing that you have that is going to be a blessing for the boys wedding day is a servants heart and a willingness to do whatever to make things special. You are the furthest thing from a zilla. I could introduce them to a mother of the groom that can be one....lol
ReplyDeleteWe love you because you are "chaotic, loud, klutzy, clown around, a control freak, as far from relaxed as you can be, tomboyish, and well, not classy".
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