Well, this is going to be an interesting week. I am returning to the place I grew up for a 5 day conference. I have to admit that I am somewhat nervous. I have not been there in over 20 years. So why would I be nervous? I happen to know that several people I grew up with still live there. The old feelings of inadequacy have come rushing back. One thing that I will hold my head up high about is that I have been married for 21 years to the same guy. I haven't been divorced, separated, or cheated. I have 3 smart boys and we are still happy. (I may gripe about my family from time to time but overall we are happy.) So why should I be nervous? I think I am actually a successful person overall. I have a good job that I like and I am pretty decent at what I do.
I never felt good enough in school compared to all these people. Now after all this time I still see them as the cheerleaders, prom queens, valedictorians, best singer, best actress/actor. I still see them as they were in high school. Skinny, beautiful, with all the bells and whistles. I still compare them to what they were 25 years ago. Guess what. They are not the same people as they were then. I am not the same person I was then. (Thank goodness!)
So in the famous words of my husband--I need to get over this. I need to hold my head up high and be proud of who I have become and who I am now. So take that.
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